Must We Wear Black?

Do you have a couple of suits or dresses that you call your “funeral outfits” ?  I do.  And I wore one of them Saturday to a Memorial Service for a family friend.  It seemed I was in the minority.  My black dress and jacket looked a bit out of place in a room full of lighter colors, jeans, cowboy boots and flip flops.

While I admit to being a bit surprised by the lack of traditional funeral attire, I was delighted to see a huge crowd in attendance.  200 people came to pay respects and tell stories about the deceased.  Isn’t their presence more important than what they wore?  I think so.  Most of the time.  But I can also see the other side; how putting some effort into a nice polished appearance can be a sign of respect for the grieving.  Surely anyone can put up with a stiff jacket or high heels for a few hours, right?

I know times are changing.  We are a much more casual society than we ever were.  While the etiquette books still recommend dark colored, non-casual clothing, I think the important thing is that people show up to show their love and support.

What do you think?  Is it okay for people to wear casual, colored clothing to a funeral home or memorial service?