Sleep-deprived Jersey: Wawa confusion, wrong cars, and pure chaos

Today on The Judi & EJ Show we talked about sleep—or, honestly, the lack of it. Apparently it’s a trend here in the Great Garden State, because Kyle, Judi, and I all dragged ourselves into the studio after a rough night.

Judi got 2.5 hours of sleep. My Fitbit gave me a very trendy sleep score of 67, which it claims is “fair,” but felt more like “good luck out there, buddy.”

Struggling with sleep in New Jersey? You’re not alone

Judi was wide awake, mind buzzing, staring at the clock on the ceiling. I stayed up way too late working, finally fell asleep, then woke up with my brain immediately reminding me of all the stuff I had to do today. You know the drill.

Every morning my wife and I compare our Fitbit sleep scores like it’s our own weird Olympic event. Anything over an 80 and we’re basically functioning humans again.

With the way our schedules look, if exhaustion were an Olympic sport, New Jersey would take home the gold, silver, and bronze.

Why New Jersey life makes us so tired

Between the traffic, the “this should’ve been a 20-minute drive but somehow it took an hour” chaos, and the life-changing decisions you make at a Wawa touchscreen, we’re running on caffeine, stubbornness, and whatever magic keeps this state upright.

According to a recent survey from the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, 72% of Americans say sleepiness regularly affects their daily lives—and you know Jersey is carrying a big chunk of that percentage on its back.

The ridiculous things tired Jersey people do

So with that in mind, here’s a list of the very real, very stupid things we all do while sleepy:

• Walking into Wawa for a coffee, forgetting why you’re there, and walking out with mac & cheese, a hoagie, and zero memory of how it happened.

• Getting into the wrong car at the grocery store and arguing with the door handle because “this is definitely my Nissan.”

• Putting Pork Roll in the pantry and the bread in the fridge—future you will not appreciate the surprise.

• Falling asleep on NJ Transit, waking up in a panic thinking you missed your stop, only to realize the train hasn’t even left Newark.

• Pouring orange juice into your coffee mug, staring at it, and genuinely considering drinking it anyway because caffeine is caffeine.

• Leaving the house without your keys… or your phone… or your wallet… but remembering a reusable bag you’ll never actually use.

• Trying to unlock your front door with your key fob and getting annoyed when your “house won’t beep.”

• Putting your phone in the freezer and blaming literally everyone except yourself.

• Merging onto the Parkway, instantly forgetting what lane you need, and just embracing the chaos.

• Sending a sleepy text that autocorrect turns into pure nonsense—and your Jersey friends still reply, “lmao same.”

• Waving back at someone who absolutely wasn’t waving at you, then pretending you were just swatting away imaginary shore mosquitoes.

A sleep-deprived state of mind (literally)

So if you catch yourself doing any of this sleepy Jersey nonsense, just know you’re in good company. We’re all out here running on fumes, Wawa, and pure attitude.