I’m honest when it comes to days when for a variety of reasons from lack of creativity to lack of sleep I just don’t have anything to offer.  On those days I search the archives and offer a re-run and today happens to be one of those days.

Lars Baron/Getty Images)
(Lars Baron/Getty Images)
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This one is about emails many of us receive in which information is passed on that is supposedly important and informative.  The problem is trying to decide between what is truth and what is fiction because:

 

 

  • I can no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.
  • I can’t put lemon slices in my water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.
  • I can’t use the TV remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the channels…nor can I sit down on the bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened since the last time it was washed.
  • I can no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
  • I can’t answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Uganda, Singapore and places I can’t even pronounce.
  • I no longer have any money because I gave it all to the sick girl who is about to die in the hospital for the millionth time…is she the same one who wants to collect get well cards as a last wish?
  • However the good news is that I will be getting $15,000 from AOL and Microsoft for taking part in their special email program…man they must have a lot of money to do this.
  • At least I don’t have to worry about my soul because I have 300,000 angels looking out for me and St. Theresa’s novena has granted me every wish.
  • However I also learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to 7 of my friends and make a wish within 5 minutes.  Is someone actually keeping time because it would really tick me off if I lost out on something by a minute or two?
  • As a follow-up to that one….a co-worker sent me what was called a Prayer for Finances last week.  I had to send it to 8 others in 8 minutes to receive something I have long awaited.  I am still waiting.

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