Parents, wake up! Brick Twp. martial arts teacher’s book compiles worst behaviors
Kids are our most precious resources but sometimes parenting can be exhausting when they get into trouble. “Stop Painful Parenting…Tales From Our Side of the Mat” author and karate instructor Master Paul Prendergast explains that most effective ways to raise your kids so bad behavior doesn’t become a habit.
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Prendergast says it’s important to instruct children that it’s not okay to behave that way if they do or say something wrong.
“If they’re starting off as little ones and then now they’re 15 or 16-years old and that behavior is really not cute anymore,” said Prendergast.
If your not making the proper effort to correct wrongful behavior, he adds, their behavior will escalate.
“Eventually you’re going to pay the price and you’re going to see it down the road,” said Prendergast. “The idea is hopefully people can see it, maybe a little nudge with the book and someone close to them can say ‘hey, you know maybe you want to re-think the way your doing that’.”
Kids are our most precious resources, but sometimes parenting can be exhausting when they get into trouble.
Prendergast explains that sometimes a mother and a father just need a reminder of why they became parents in the first place.
However even if things are going well, and the kids stay out of trouble, other outside challenges can arise.
For Prendergast it was tragedy.
“I lost my wife seven-years ago and I was thrust into a new world of being a single parent,” said Prendergast. “Nothing meant more to me than focusing on raising this kid right.”
His parental focus didn’t sway but throughout it all, he says his daughter is the most important person in his life and he aims to raise her the right way so she can grow.
” ‘Right or wrong these are the rules, this is what I expect from you, this is what we’re going to do or accomplish’,” said Prendergast. “I help guide her…my job is to guide her.”
When raising your child he says it’s as much about giving them praise for good behavior as it is correcting them when they do something wrong, so they can learn from their mistakes and grow into mature adults.
If you want them to grow up into outstanding citizens, help steer them away from troubling temptations he advises.
“There’s three words that we always need to keep in mind when we’re teaching, raising kids or creating a business…Raise Your Standards,” said Prendergast.
Part of being a parent, he adds is making sure your kids are doing their homework, chores and other household or personal responsibilities so they can develop their skill set and a sense of good behavior as they get older.
With the smiles and laughter comes some poor behavior, he explains.
Kicking, screaming and swearing are all among various forms of disrespect kids may aggressively show towards their parents, siblings, teachers, strangers or anyone else.
Inside of his karate school, Prendergast says he’s had to address this particular situation a few times when he observed some off behavior between parents and their kids or kids acting out towards others.
He asks parents things like, “Why is he doing this? Why are you allowing this?,” Prendergast adds, “Then I’ll ask, ‘well why are we continuing to do this?’ and a lot of times the parents can’t answer me.”
He’ll then ask them why they continue to allow that behavior to occur, he adds, and they’ll try and reason that that’s who they are.
At that point it’s time to change your approach, so no one gets hurt.